straight down the line

Police Beat

Shadow, 25, was arrested Rose’s Park, Rose avenue, at 2:00pm. Shadow is accused of stalking multiple people as they walked through the park. Shadow is accused of walking directly behind people trying to blend into their own shadows. He is being accused of scaring young children when he jumped from the shadows.

“I was just playing hide and seek with the children, I love kids I didn’t mean them any harm! As for following people, I did no such thing I saw them yelling at their own shadow. I think people just have it out for me!” stated Shadow.

“I saw him lurking in my shadow from the corner of my eye, it freaked me out so I told him to get lost stop following me because it was creepy. He didn’t listen so I ran.” said Molly a frequent visitor at the park. “Shadow he is a nice guy, we love to play with him every time we go outside” reported Anne, a small child. “He is a thief and was probably just trying to find something to take from my daughter and the other victims, ugh what a loser trying to steal from children.” said Anne’s mother.

Prosecutors say he will not be charged for this incident though some unrelated changes may be pending.

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